Reflecting on my journey, I realize that self-reflection wasn’t a skill I possessed during my formative years. It wasn’t taught in school and wasn’t emphasized at home. Instead, my focus was directed outward, learning to analyze the actions of others and react based on how their choices made me feel. I never felt the need to scrutinize my own feelings or voice, creating a life where I felt frozen and trapped in a victim, codependent mentality.
The turning point came when I started on the journey of writing my memoir. Confronted with narrating stories carried over decades, I couldn’t escape the patterns, habits, and my role in the events. It was a mirror held up to my life, reflecting back the parts I had long ignored. Forced into extensive self-reflection, I began to unravel the layers of my experiences.
The mirror reflection shooting back at me held the deepest truths that needed acknowledging.
For the first time, I saw my own reflection staring back at me from the pages of my narrative. It was a raw confrontation. Period. I started acknowledging my roles in shaping my reality until I was 46. Life had dealt me an unexpected batch of unfortunate events, but through self-reflection, I recognized my share of responsibility
Understanding my role allowed me to reclaim power over my feelings, reactions, and responses. For the first time, I realized I held the key to my happiness, transcending my perpetual quest for validation and the need to be right. It was a transformative shift from victimhood to ownership.
Tumbled: A Memoir of Perseverance, Personal Growth & Magical Transformation
Through this journey, I’ve learned invaluable lessons that I believe make self-reflection a crucial tool for personal growth:
Heightened Self-Awareness
Engaging in self-reflection became a profound journey toward my own increased self-awareness. This process enabled me to understand myself deeply—my values, beliefs, and motivations. Don’t get me wrong, these revelations weren’t always comfortable confronting. Yet I understood that by consistently reflecting on my thoughts and actions, I uncovered the patterns I habitually followed, recognized my strengths, and identified areas needing improvement. The elevation of my self-awareness was a pivotal element in fostering my personal growth.
Learning from Experiences
Self-reflection allowed me to scrutinize my past experiences, embracing both the positive and negative aspects. In turning my gaze inward, I uncovered numerous valuable lessons and insights. It was a transformative thinking shift as I began to prioritize understanding myself over scrutinizing others. This marked a new learning phase, granting me a deep awareness of the impact of my actions and decisions. This understanding empowered me to make purposeful, informed choices that would shape my future with more purpose.
Goal Setting and Alignment
Once I recognized the immense value of self-reflection, I decided to embrace it as an enduring life skill, one I chose not to disengage from. Now, I leverage reflection to clarify my goals and dreams and evaluate my values and priorities. Through this contemplative practice, I align my actions with long-term objectives, understanding that this alignment is pivotal for maintaining focus, positivity, and motivation and staying on course toward accomplishing my personal growth milestones.
Adaptability and Emotional Intelligence
I used to perceive myself as “smart,” not realizing how much I really had to learn. Now, I understand the difference between academic and emotional intelligence, and I can confidently say that self-reflection has notably heightened the latter. My emotional intelligence has grown since engaging in a more profound self-reflection process, enabling me to identify and navigate my emotions more effectively. I notice I can face challenges without feeling overwhelmed, responding with greater balance. Cultivating emotional intelligence through self-reflection has significantly contributed to fostering healthier relationships (releasing unhealthy ones) and overall resilience in my life.
That’s me – a much more self aware, happy human!
Self-reflection kicked into high gear when I committed to writing my memoir. I am grateful for the profound learning experiences that this process allowed, serving as a catalyst that guided me toward a more satisfying and joyful life.
When was the last time you engaged in introspection, delving beyond the surface mirror reflection to gain deeper insight into yourself?
My name is Heather Wilde. I am an author, indie-publisher, blogger, artist, and trauma survivor. Visit HezzieMae.com for a sea change paradigm shift in author mentoring & custom publishing.
